


The Internet is for Porn

by misbegotten



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Comment Fic, Episode Tag, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-29
Updated: 2010-04-29
Packaged: 2017-10-09 05:40:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/83634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misbegotten/pseuds/misbegotten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Sam is propositioned. Coda to 5x19.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Internet is for Porn

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers for 5x19, _Hammer of the Gods_.

Pestilence was nasty. Sam had rubbed his skin raw getting the buzz of flies off his flesh, hot water raining down his body. He'd considered wandering southward, tugging his limp cock into some kind of release, but since Gabriel's death he'd been too tired... too depressed to work up any enthusiasm for carnal activities. One time he had even turned on Gabriel's Casa Erotica DVD just to watch the archangel, see him leer and laugh and be so fucking _alive_. As it turned out, the "erotic" scene with Gabriel and the blonde had faded out to black, for which Sam was grateful.

Only Castiel suspected how hard hit Sam had been by Gabriel's passing. Sam could see it in the angel's eyes, the dismal loss that they now shared.

Cas and Dean were in the room next door, no doubt erasing memories of the battle with Pestilence in their own way, so Sam had no qualms about wandering back into the motel room with nothing more than a towel in hand to wipe the water from his hair.

"Wow, Sammy, you really are proportional aren't you?" came a voice from the other side of the room.

Sam dropped the towel and put a hand to his heart which had, literally, skipped a beat. "Jesus Christ, Gabriel!"

Gabriel was in his motel room. On his laptop screen. Leering at him. Sam scrambled for the towel and cinched it around his waist before closing the distance to his computer. "Gabriel, is that you?"

On-screen Gabriel sparkled briefly and made the background flash obnoxious colors. "In the flesh! Well, not so much in the flesh as in the pixels. But you get the idea."

"I'm not sure I do," Sam said slowly, trying to wrap his brain around the fact that there was an archangel ensconced in his computer. "Are you okay?"

Gabriel frowned, snapped his fingers, and suddenly Sam's wallpaper turned into a luxurious bed. Gabriel threw himself onto it, bouncing slightly. "As okay as I can be, trapped in your boring laptop for the duration. You don't even have any good porn on here. Why don't you download something tonight and we'll have a little fun." Gabriel waggled his eyebrows comically, and Sam wanted to laugh until he cried.

"How do we get you out?"

Gabriel shrugged dismissively. "It's just going to take time for me to get my power back," he said. "It took this long to even work my grace out of that DVD and sit on your hard drive." He grinned at Sam. "Thanks for leaving the DVD in, bee tee double-you. That made things a lot easier." His grin got broader. "Or should I say harder?"

Sam flushed. "I did not jack off to your lame-ass attempt at porn. Hung-garian."

Gabriel clapped his hands in glee. "But you thought about it, didn't you?" He steepled his hands behind his head and spread himself over the pixelated bed. "You like me," he sing-songed. "Let's get it on, virtual style."

"Shut up," Sam said, and moved to close the laptop lid.

"Wait!" Gabriel cried out. "The internet is for porn! We can make beautiful mpreg babies! I'll tell everyone on Facebook that you don't cry through sex!"

"Goodnight," Sam said firmly. Gabriel was definitely going to be the death of him. One way or another.


End file.
